Darkscribes Blog for The Mustachioed Cat

Old World Jokes are not Chic

February 9, 2008 | No Comments Posted

So close to a full chapter of TFC I can taste it. I've got one subplot to weave into the second-to-last scene and it'll be done, and I can start writing Shinji's "Great Sayaman" arc. As I sit down, crack my knuckles, and start a read-over, I get a phone call. Why, it is my dear friend, whose relationship have stopped by and offered to take her to dinner!

Naturally, she wants me to run interference. Both visitors are pretty heavy into the Polish front, and she relies on my normal manner of speech confusing them. Distracting them so they won't ask her prying questions. So I close my laptop, treck out into six inches of motherfucking permafrost beneath twelve inches of nasty snow, and go to this restuarant.

I was able to amuse myself through most of the meal by playing a Civilization game in my head. Ethiopia on Huge with Low Sea Level and Tropical Climate. First research to Masonry for Great Wall wonder, then research to Iron Working so I could clear out jungle. Make it to Confucianism with The Oracle giving me Codes of Law research. I was about 15 turns in when I heard the joke, which was to be the most amusing thing I did not contribute to the conversation:

"Jesus went to Galilee to act as a doctor, because, you know, he was a healer. So these men bring in a really sick guy. So sick they had to cart him in on a wheel-barrow. Jesus touches the man and he is instantly cured. The now-healthy man says of Jesus later, 'He touched me and I was made well, but, you know, he never took my blood pressure.'"

That was the joke.

MY contribution, which I found much more amusing, was when they were talking about the corrupt state of Polish government, about how American privitization is ruining everything. I suggested that my friend should return to Poland and run for office. To which she replied 'That job is the most thankless in the world, screw that.'  My answer was to list off all the things she could acquire as Prime Minister of Poland. These things were:

1) A jet.

2) A posh office.

3) Heath Ledger's corpse.

Needless to say, she did a face-fault. I don't think her relations understood. Ah well.

I managed to get to the Renaissance before the check came.