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Deep within the studio, Rion is rolling around in his little wheelchair. He’s covered in bandages from his beating at the hands of his prisoners. His leg was broken and elevated as he progressed, and he was still recovering from the pencil to his… private area. He suddenly stops seeing a man in black leaning against the wall with a lit cigarette hanging from his lips and chuckling.

Lord Deathscythe: <Chuckling> Having problems with your little experiment Rion?

Rion:< Grumbling> Bite me LD! How was I supposed to know that those kids had no appreciation for fine music?

LD: I’m part vampire so don’t tempt me, and I’ve heard your singing and fine music doesn’t begin to describe the nails on the chalkboard feeling I get from listening to you. But that isn’t why I have come.

Rion: What do you want? Come here to insult me, or have you come to raid an invalids hentai collection?

LD: Hardly, I came to offer mine and my people’s services. I have an idea that, while some may take it the wrong way in the beginning, will get you the retribution you desire.

Rion: You know the rules. No one is allowed outside contact. No one leaves the house. And above all, no and I mean NO HENTAI!

LD: No problem. <Yelling to the back> BRING IN THE CRATES GUYS! AND BE CAREFUL OF THE AIRHOLES!

As Rion settles back into his chair, Random1377, EpyonZero, and Ryan T. Nelson push three large crates into the studio. Rion can’t help but notice the of vampires surrounding the crates with electric cattle prods. In fact, one of the vampires used his cattle prod when a decidedly tentacle-ish appendage slithered out of one of the crates vents.

Rion: <Veins popping in his forehead> WHAT DID I SAY?! NO HENTAI?! And you come in here with not one but THREE TENTACLE MONSTERS! THREE?!

LD: <Calmly> Let me ask you a question. If I lock a girl in a three foot thick adamantium cell with a tentacle monster, yet not allow anyone on the outside to see what’s going on in there, is it really hentai?

Rion: Of course it is! The girls end up getting violated by numerous things!

LD: <Smirking> Ahhh, but can you be sure of that? Be assured, no harm will come to the girls. But they don’t know that either.

Just as LD puts out his cigarette and lights up another one, a young woman reaches up and snatches it out of his mouth and breaks it.

LD: ANGEL! What do you think you’re doing?

Angel17: You quit smoking remember? I’m not going to let you start up again!

LD: You just won’t get off of my ass for that will you?

Angel17: No chance in hell LD. This is for your own good.

As LD Sulks over Angel’s interruption of his smoking man persona, Random1377 comes in the room to report the progress. This wouldn’t be so bad, but Random decided to dress slightly… off today.

Random1377: LD, we got the crates and the cells in place.

LD: <Staring bug eyed at Random, and noticing that he really needs to shave his legs to pull off the fuku> What in the fires of Lucifer are you doing wearing that?!

Random1377: What? You don’t think this makes me look fat do you?

Angel17: Could be worse. At least he’s wearing the Serina fuku and not the spores.

LD: I remember the last time he did that. <Both LD and Angel Shudder at the memory> Lets get this show started already, and Random.

Random1377: Yes?

LD: Put some damn pants on!

Angel17 <Whispering to LD>: At least he didn’t bend over.

 

Hellmates

Part 13 - What's going on in there?! - By Lord Legato Deathscythe and the Darkscribes

Setting (Sitting on the couch are Hikari and Touji, who have slowly regained their sanity after having to listen to Rion’s screeching voice.)

Asuka: Rei, do you think Shinji and Karou are well enough to be let out of there rooms yet?

Rei: I’ll go check.

(Rei proceeds down the hall and checks on Karou first. Karou is sitting in a corner in a straight jacket. A loud recording of ‘Ode to Joy” playing from the stereo having calmed him down.)

Rei: Karou, are you ready to come out now?

Karou (In a sort of bliss): Yes Rei.

(Rei looks Karou over, satisfied that the treatment has succeeded. She slowly releases him from the restraints, and lets him exit and go to the living room. Rei then proceeds to Shinji’s Room. Oddly enough, Shinji had been the hardest one of the group to bring back to reality. It seemed that he took music a bit too seriously. Rei slowly opens Shinji’s door.)

Rei: Shinji?

Shinji (In a disturbingly calm voice): Yes Rei?

Rei: How are you feeling?

Shinji: I’m fine Rei. Everything is fine. May I have my cooking knives back now? I need to fillet something.

Rei: What are you going to fillet Shinji?

Shinji: That’s simple Rei; I’m going to fillet Rion. He’s going to become part of my one true culinary masterpiece.

Rei: Shinji, you know that you can’t make food out of people.

Shinji: Why not? He would be so tasty properly seasoned.

Rei: I do not think you are ready to come out yet Shinji.

Shinji: But think of it Rei. I could serve up his liver, with some fava beans and a nice ceante. <Shinji begins to make slurping sounds eerily resembling those of one Dr. Hanibal Lector>

Rei: I think not Shinji, I’m a vegetarian. I will check on you later.

(Closes and locks the bolt on Shinji’s door to keep him inside. Rei returns to the kitchen to report to Asuka.)

Rei: Karou is fit to rejoin us and I have allowed him to do so.

Asuka: And Shinji?

Rei: He’s planning out dinner.

Asuka: So why didn’t you let him out?

Rei: Rion was the main course.

(Through the door come in several vampires guarding crates while three midsized cells were put in place.)

Asuka: Oh no, not another one. 

Rei: It seems we have helped the others regain their sanity only for them to lose it again.

(As the cells are put in place and the guards prevent the kids from escaping through the door, the Darkscribes enter followed by LD.)

LD (With a rather sadistic smirk): Greetings kids. Hope you had a nice break.

Touji: Just who the hell are you?

LD: I am Lord Deathscythe, High Lord of the Darkscribes, Proprietor of Darkscribes.org, Dark Lord of the Fics!

Angel17: No need to be so melodramatic LD.

LD: Oh thank you for ruining the mode.

(Random walks in, this time he is wearing something that covers his legs. Unfortunatly….)

Asuka: WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING IN MY PLUGSUIT!?!?

Random1377: What? Don’t tell me this makes me look fat too.

Karou: Not at all, you look very nice.

Asuka: When I’m done with you, you’re gonna wish you were fat.

(Asuka proceeds to beat the living HELL out of Random. Nothing is done to stop this, as LD and the rest simply chuckle as Random is beaten by the fiery German.)

LD: Is someone recording all this? This will sell well on E-Bay. We can call it “Asuka Strikes Back!”

EpyonZero: Sorry LD, I didn’t bring the camcorder.

LD: Damnit Epyon. I guess it’s another 72 hours in the torture pit for you when we get home.

(Epyon pales considerably thinking of what the torture pit implies)

Epyon: NOOOOOOO! I DON’T WANT TO SEE KAJI/FUYUTSUKI/GENDO YAOI’S AGAIN!!!

Everyone but Karou: EWWWWWWWWWW!!!!

Karou: Might I take a turn in this pit of yours?

LD: Sorry, I don’t think so. There’s a reason is called a “Torture Pit.” Maybe make you watch 72 hours of Misato/Ritsuko/Maya Yuri.

Karou: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Girls: HENTAI!

Touji: Cool!

LD: Spike, get Random to the med bay. D and Blade, take Epyon away.

(Spike proceeds to drag out the unconscious Random while D and Blade drag Epyon kicking and screaming to his fate.)

LD: Before we start today’s little exercise in horror, where is Shinji?

Rei: He is currently locked in his room until he has regained his sanity.

Angel17: Rion’s singing was really that bad?

(Everyone except Asuka and Rei shudder at the memory)

All: You don’t want to know.

LD: I’ll handle it. Wouldn’t want him to start off mad before we do it ourselves.

(LD walks to Shinji’s room and opens the door wide. He pulls out a small metal cylinder which expands with one red eye. Changing some settings on the neuralizor and dawning his sunglasses, he flashes Shinji with it.)

LD: You did not hear Rion singing. What you heard was simply a cat getting its tail stepped on.

Shinji: (Slowly coming out of his stupor) Whoa, the cat okay?

LD: Just fine, now come on. It’s time for you to join us.

(As LD and Shinji enter the room, LD notices that the crates have been delivered. The smirk on his face seeming to become even more sadistic.)

LD: Now everyone, I have a question for you. When does Hentai fail to be Hentai?

Hikari: You know the rules. No Hentai.

LD: Ah, but if no one sees it, is it really hentai?

(The girls notice one of the crates has a tentacle slithering out it. LD simply pets the slimy little thing)

LD: Isn’t it so cute. They are so egger to play with you three. I have engineered them specifically for each one of you girls. I even named them after writers known for writing parts with you paired with Shinji. For Asuka I have created Axel, named for my good friend and author of many A/S fics. For Hikari I have created Hotwire, who could forget his work. And for Rei I have Ryan X, known for being one of your strongest supporters. I hope you enjoy playing with them, I know they will enjoy playing with you.

Rei: I do not understand.

Asuka: But Rion wouldn’t let you get away with this! This breaks the no hentai rule big time!

Hikari: She’s right. How dare you!

LD: Do you think Rion would object after your attack put him in the hospital for a week? I’ve already cleared this with him.

Touji: COOL! FINALLY SOMETHING WORTH WATCHING AROUND HERE!

Hikari: TOUJI!

Touji: EEP!

Angel17: Sorry boys, but you don’t get to watch. The girls and their monsters will be locked away in these cells. Three feet of adamantium to keep you from seeing or hearing anything. While they are in here, you will be out here watching only one thing.

Shinji: What is that? (Please, make it something good)

Touji: Yeah what? (I hope its video of Misato in the Shower)

Karou: That Kaji/Fuyutsuki/Gendo Yaoi would be nice to watch.

LD: No Karou, I’m a strict no Yaoi person, as is every one of the Dark… scribes...

(Everyone begins to stare at Angel17 as she listens to her headphones humming YMCA)

Angel17: (Noticing the stares) What?

LD: Nothing. (Grumble)

Karou: Isn’t that hypocritical when you keep a stash for the torture pit?

LD: That’s why it’s called torture. No, you three will be watching a never ending thread of Martha Stewart Living while the girls are in there.

Touji and Karou: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! 

Shinji: Cool, I’ll be able to get some ideas to redecorate the place.

(Everyone just stares at Shinji)

LD: Riiiiight. Anyway, toss the girls in.

(The vampires proceed to physically force the girls into the cells. Angel switches on the TV and immediately Martha Stewart’s show begins playing. The doors on the cells are slammed shut, locking the girls in and the boys out.)

LD: Well, See you in a few hours.

Angel17: (Grinning sinisterly) Have fuuuuuunnn!

(LD and Angel depart, leaving the vampires to guard the cages. Touji and Karou are already twitching from listening to Martha’s voice. Shinji is starting to take notes.)

 

(In the Cells, Asuka is slamming her fists into the door trying to get out. All the sudden, a viewscreen pops out of the roof and LD’s face shows up)

LD: Asuka, you might want to change before we let Axel in.

Asuka: YEAH RIGHT! You just want me to get naked before you have that monster do hentai things to me.

LD: Who said it would? I don’t remember saying that the monsters were going to be hentai.

Asuka: Don’t try to fool me. I heard you, you said play with us.

LD: Yes I did say that. Be assured, I meant what I said when I said they had been specially engineered for you. Now I would suggest you switch into those clothes we have to your right.

(Asuka looks and find a training outfit sitting there all in red.)

Asuka: You don’t mean.

LD: Yup, Axel is trained to be the perfect sparring partner for you. He’s got some striking pads on his tentacles to give you something to hit, as well as some gloves to let him toss some punches at you.

Asuka: Cool.

 

(In Cell 2, Hikari notices that the cell is simply one big kitchen)

Angel17: Hope you get along with Hotwire in there Hikari.

Hikari: What sort of sick game is this?!

Angel17: No sick game. Hotwire is a master chef. All those tentacles of his let him do several things at once. But don’t try to get him to make anything like calamari, it depresses him.

(In comes the tentacle monster Hotwire, wearing an apron and one of those chefs hats that fluff out on top.)

Hikari: Nice, lets see what we can make.

 

(Cell 3, Rei stares at the tentacle monster. The Monster stares back. This goes one for a time)

Rei: I still do not understand.

(In the booth LD, Angel17, and Rion watch the state of affairs in the house. The girls seem to be doing well in the cells, having a great time. The boys are another story.)

Rion: Are Touji and Karou supposed to be twitching like that?

Angel17: Yup. You know how it is when watching Martha Stewart.

LD: Wouldn’t you be twitching if you had to watch Martha Stewart with the promise of endless tentacle hentai just beyond your grasp?

Rion: But Shinji doesn’t seem to be affected.

LD: This is Shinji we are talking about.

Rion: Got a point. (Strikes a Gendo Pose as much as possible with a broken leg)

LD: Everything is going according to my plans. The girls are unharmed, as you requested. We have not nor will we break any of the rules you set. Plus look at the ratings.

Angel17: Yeah… wait a sec. What’s Rei doing?

(On the TV with cell 3 marked on it, Rei seems to moving towards Ryan X. She starts petting the monster and then…)

Rion LD and Angel17:  WHAT THE HELL?!

Rion (Glaring at LD) : I thought you said nothing was going to happen!

LD: I didn’t expect Rei to try something. She’s so quiet.

Angel17: You know what they say about the quiet ones.

(All in the room tip their head slightly to the side just a bit)

LD: Damn she’s limber.

 

(Cell 1)

 

Asuka (In a sports bra, running pants and boxing gloves): Ok Axel, lets see what you can do.

(Asuka begins throwing several punches and kicks at Axel, who blocks them and throw some of his own. This goes on for a while.)

Asuka: You’re good. I haven’t had this good a workout in a while.

(Asuka and Axel continue to spar as we check in on Cell 2)

 

Hikari: Pass me the seaweed Hotwire.

(Hotwire passes Hikari said seaweed as he continues to chop up celery and checks the roast in the oven)

 

(Cell 3)

(Rei… well lets just say Rei and Ryan X. are having fun on their own.)

 

(outside the Cells)

 

Touji: I don’t know how much more I can take.

(Martha starts going through how to make some sort of decorative pottery thing)

Touji: Forced to watch… this when the mother of all tentacle hentai parties is going on.

Karou: I know. I wouldn’t mind watching that right now. Anything but… her.

(Touji and Karou both twitch at the thought of enduring more hours of this. Shinji walks up)

Shinji: Touji, mind holding this for a sec?

(Shinji hands Touji the end of some fabric and spreads it out. After making some cuts in it, he goes back to the shadows. 

Touji: How can he be so calm right now. Doesn’t he want to see what’s going on in there?

Karou: I don’t think I want to know. It looks as if Ms. Stewart has claimed yet another soul.

(In the control room, TommyRude storms in looking to beat LD into pulp)

TR: LD, TIME TO PLAY THE GAME!

LD: What are you talking about?

TR: I heard what you did to Asuka. You didn't do that. TELL ME you did NOT just do that!!

Angel17: This is what we wanted everyone to think. Take a look at the monitor.

(TR looks at the monitor hooked to Asuka’s cell and watches her through a few kicks at Axel)

TR: What the Hell are they doing?

LD: They’re sparring. They’ve been at it for over an hour. Just as I predicted, Axel has been trained well.

Rion: Hikari’s cell is starting to look like an episode of Emirle from Food Network.

TR: But what’s Rei doing… MEIN GOTT IN HIMMEL!

LD: I know, I think they have broken some laws in certain states.  

Rion: I think we could sell this, or add it to my… private collection.

LD: I think not Rion. I have all the video being transmitted to DS central.

Rion: You bastard!

LD: Yes.

 

(Cell 1)

 

Asuka: Come on, you got any more?

(Axel proceeds to launch an attack on Asuka which she blocks with some difficulty but successfully. Asuka starts throwing punches and kicks at Axel.)

 

(Cell 2)

 

Hikari: And we add some powdered sugar like this. BAM BAM BAM!

(Hikari and Hotwire have prepared a wondrous feast in their cell and have settled down to enjoy their work.)

 

(Cell 3)

 

(Use your Imagination)

 

Shinagami: LD, we found something interesting in Rei’s room.

LD: What was it, and why were you in Rei’s Room?

Shinagami: Shinji was redecorating. We found this book under her bed, I think this explains what she’s been… doing.

Rion: What is it?

LD: A First edition copy of the Necronomicon.

(Everyone save LD Face Vaults)

Rion: Well, that explains a few things.

Angel17: Yeah but I’m worried about Ryan. We didn’t train him for that. I don’t know what effect this could have on him.

LD: Ah if anything we can give him a home with one of our Hentai departments. Now, I believe it’s time to release our captives into the general population.

 

(Cell 1)

 

LD: Asuka, time to finish up and prepare to go.

Asuka: Ah damn it, back to Hell.

LD: Don’t worry. Shinji has a surprise for you when you get out. He’s actually taken Martha to heart and redid the whole house. I think you’ll enjoy it.

Asuka: Alright, I’ll hold you to it.

(Asuka proceeds to get dressed from her training outfit. Before she leaves LD notices something that will completely destroy the ruse)

LD: Asuka, Your clothes are too clean.

Asuka: What do you mean?

LD: I mean they are all nice and crisp. Your dress looks the exact same as it did when you went in. This could completely ruin the effect I’m planning.

Asuka: Well what do you want me to do about it?

LD: You nothing. Axel knows what to do. Axel.

(Axel proceeds to mess around with Asuka’s dress, moving a strap down her shoulder, wrinkling the fabric, and basically messing her clothes up.)

Asuka: Hey, I may have to act as if I was ravished by your tentacle monster, but do I have to look like it?

LD: Yes. I’m not too worried about your hair and color because of your exercise. Besides, I’m sure Shinji won’t mind making your dress look as lovely as it usually does.

Asuka: Well yeah.

LD: Come on Asuka, admit it. There something between going on between you and Shinji?

Asuka: WHAT?! NO WAY!

LD: You sure? God knows I think you two make a cute couple. But I think Random prefers him with Rei.

Asuka: Random… you mean that FREAK that was in my plug suit?

LD: That would be him.

Asuka: I’ll have to do something about this.

LD: Go for it Asuka. Nothing to lose.

 

(Cell 2)

 

LD: Hey Hikari, lovely meal but time for you to come out of your cell

Hikari: You sure? I’m pretty happy here.

LD: Yup, your having too much fun. Can’t have that now can we.

Hikari: If you say so.

 

(Cell 3)

 

LD: Rei, let Ryan go. Don’t make me come in there.

(As the girls exit the cells, the house has been transformed in the few hours that the girls have been sequestered. Shinji has completely redone the interior in a lovely New England provincial style. In fact, the only things out of place are the two lumps on the couch. Upon closer inspection it turns out that the lumps are actually the zombified Touji and Karou. In order for them to survive with what was left of their sanity, it appears that they have entered a catatonic state. LD enters the house and notices that his efforts were only two thirds successful. He isn’t worried, two zombiefied boys were better then none.)

LD: So boys and girls, hope you had fun.

Rei: It was… enjoyable.

(Everyone just stares at Rei)

LD: I bet. Oh well I know I had fun in this little exercise in agony. Wonder what the next poor bastard who does this will do.

Hikari: Don’t give them any ideas.

LD: I won’t. That would kill the excitement. Later.

(Shinji begins handing out silk robes to the girls.)

Shinji: I thought you three would be real tiered after what ever happened in there so I got some baths ready for you. I also redid your rooms and had some flowers put in to brighten things up.

(All three of the girls go off to their baths as Shinji makes one final addition. He places two buckets around Touji and Karou’s necks to catch the drool.)

To be continued…

 

Authors Notes: Hi all. HEHE I bet you’re wondering about what I’ve written here. Well, I was thinking one day after having read the entirety of the previous Hellmates chapters and thought to myself “How to you use a tentacle monster in a non-hentai way?” The answer was simple. They got all those tentacles so they can do more then just violate young girls. That’s where I got the ideas for Asuka and Hikari’s monsters. Rei, well I’m sticking to my “If you don’t see it is it really hentai” argument. You can thnk the previous hosts for that. As for Touji and Karou, well wouldn’t YOU turn into a zombie if you had to watch nothing but Martha Stewart when the mother of all Hentai parties was going on. When you are not invited? Shinji, well Shinji is good with the house work.

 

As always, C&C me at webmaster@darkscribes.org and enjoy the next Hellmates to come